Warrior Mode

Song: I Am The Warrior by Pat Benatar
Shooting at the walls of heartache-- Bang Bang-- I am the warrior. Victory is mine. No one writes lyrics to a song quite like they did in the 80s. I love the 80’s. I actually heard this song on the radio earlier and adopted it as my theme for the day. I didn’t realize it would be my anthem. I was reminded of this song again when I came across his blog this evening, the one I was not to read. I guess tonight was the night I was to locate it. I read his entries in disgust. This person that I was so smitten with for 3 months was an absolute cynic. I never realized just how deep his hurt from past experiences had gone, hence the pattern of wanting to be in a relationship and completely withdrawing. There was a reason he had asked me not to read this. While I thought it was because he was still working on how to write the perfect entry on how awesome I am- nope I was wrong. I have never once thought anything other than great things for this individual-- until tonight. I am so thankful that God knows our hearts. He truly knew what was best for both of us. While I was hurt and saddened by what I read, I refuse to allow this to cause me to be hardened or untrusting to others. That’s completely against my nature. And I have to be me.

Movie: Legends of the Fall

In college, I did an in depth 8 page analysis of this romantic period movie. Even after watching it 10 plus times, I never grow tired of it. Tristan, played by Brad Pitt, is described as a wild bear. He has a heart of a warrior. His goes off to war with his two brothers to defend and protect them. Tristan watches as his youngest brother, Samuel, is shot and killed in battle. He removes Samuel's heart to bring it back home to bury it on their land. He was trained to know how vital the heart was. It was his brother's life that Tristan cherished and his life that he wanted to remember. Tristan hardened his heart and cut off the people he loved due to not dealing with the grief. He instead ran away and became a hunter. What I've learned in these past few weeks is it's crucial to deal with hurt and friends and family are a vital part of your healing.